I am a willing whore for Josten's

Is there such thing as the perfect gift? In a word, yes.

Imagine a trinket that's ideal for special friends and lovable elderly racists alike. An perfect piece of sparkly magic. A gift you can look in the eye and say, "I loathe you. But goddamit, I respect you."

Such a talisman of power exists, and it can be yours for only... well... I don't know how much it costs, but I'm sure it's worth it.

When Josten's introduced the "Cirriculum Series" of their popular class rings in 1973, no less an authority than Mark Twain wrote:

"It was a bright noontime, and the raft drifted laz'ly down the river. Huck looked across the muddy expanse of the ol' Miss, and sighted [the Josten's rings] betwixt the makeshift slave cabins and a b'shaded grove of poplar trees. Jim turned, tenderly placed his Ebony hand on Huck's thigh. 'Missa Huck, those'm wrangs be oh so bright!' "

Whilst the literary world took notice, the educational world changed. New majors and degrees were offered. And Josten's never missed a step. Today, their tireless dedication has culminated in a masterwork. A shining beacon atop the tacky hill of personalized man-jewelry. The "Taxation Ring."



Oh, I could wax poetic for hours. Instead I implore you to recognize Josten's for their unending dedication to their craft, and bring this work of art home.

Yes Geoffrey, I'm Ready To Buy A Piece Of History!